Letters from Kamp Krusty

I'm Not Apologizing. Except Now. And Some Other Times.

Rule #1 in good blogging (as if I would know...) don't get too specific if you want to make a point.

Seriously.  Such is the case with the below entry on the Catalyst website.  I really didn't want to say the conference was a waste of time, or vacuous, or anything, but apparently it came across that way.  Sorry about that.

I really wanted to talk about a theme I encounter a lot:  We want to image ourselves all important-like, and that kinda scares me -- especially because I'm prone to it, myself.  I found an example.

I tried to let on that I didn't think the conference, as a whole, was portrayed well by its own web-speak, but that flew by some people.  Bad writing?  Probably.

But I knew this before:  If you give an example, an illustration from reality to make a point, the illustration may become the point.  

Especially if you include a big picture of it.  

For a more full-bodied understanding of the conference itself, see Anne Jackson's comments in the thread.  For a more full-bodied understanding of the many ways I personally struggle with trying to make myself significant, and -- possibly -- recognize it elsewhere, see the original post.

As for the "Brant, stick to your guns!" objection to my apology:  I am a-stickin' to my guns. 

Just wanted to clarify what I'm gunning for.

Check It Out: I Have My Own Cool Syndrome!

It's called "Asperger Syndrome", and it's my very own syndrome!

It's kind of an awesome syndrome to have, because it totally explains everything. 

Everything.  Seriously.  Freak out.

Like my undying fixation with toast.  My inability to understand (or even care about) small talk.  My "go thither" body language.  My almost unworldly ability to lose everything.  (I've left my car at the gym, walked home, then panicked when my car wasn't in front of our house the next day.)  "Asperger Syndrome" explains why I didn't have any dates in high school.  It explains why I'm idealistic and have a thing about defending children and animals.  And why I was President of Library Club.  And why I failed as a pie shop waiter.  And why I can't do some stuff right.

Total explanatory power.  That, my friends, is a heck of a cool syndrome.

Freaky:  When I was little -- like two -- I had a crew-cut and glasses, and I spoke with perfect diction.   I resented "baby talk", and told people so, even correcting their mispronunciations.  My mom says people called me "Little Professor".  And here's what the wiki thing says about Asperger Syndrome:

Children with AS may have an unusually sophisticated vocabulary at a young age and have been colloquially called "little professors"...

Of course, "little professor" is a nice way of saying, "annoying nerdlet who needs to shut up", but it explains, as I say, a lot.*

I can relate to people now, but couldn't do it very well as a high schooler.  Fact is, I've learned to "act" -- literally, "act" -- like a normal adult.  I figuratively wear a "WWNPD?" bracelet.  ("What Would a Normal Person Do?") 

In social situations, I constantly try to act like I suspect a normal person would, even though I don't understand why they do it.   Normal People?  You're aliens.  I study your ways, for they intrigue me.

Anyway, if you like this Syndrome, and want it for your very own, here's a test you can take.  There are lots of books about it.

My wife now knows why I don't like light, gentle touch, or why interruptions are greeted with an immediate, and unwitting, over-fierce reaction.  (I'm working on all this, I promise.  This diagnosis is no excuse for mistreating people.)   I am now a Syndrome Guy, and it's weird, but I'm kinda relieved.

------------

* --It does not explain the accordion.

And Now? She Just Lays There

Here's a for-real obit, found this week in the Vallejo (CA) Times-Herald.

My guess:  This sort of thing is rarely written, and often thought.

Dolores Aguilar
1929 - Aug. 7, 2008 Dolores Aguilar, born in 1929 in New Mexico, left us on August 7, 2008. She will be met in the afterlife by her husband, Raymond, her son, Paul Jr., and daughter, Ruby. She is survived by her daughters Marietta, Mitzi, Stella, Beatrice, Virginia and Ramona, and son Billy; grandchildren, Donnelle, Joe, Mitzie, Maria, Mario, Marty, Tynette, Tania, Leta, Alexandria, Tommy, Billy, Mathew, Raymond, Kenny, Javier, Lisa, Ashlie and Michael; great-grandchildren, Brendan, Joseph, Karissa, Jacob, Delaney, Shawn, Cienna, Bailey, Christian, Andre Jr., Andrea, Keith, Saeed, Nujaymah, Salma, Merissa, Emily, Jayci, Isabella, Samantha and Emily. I apologize if I missed anyone. Dolores had no hobbies, made no contribution to society and rarely shared a kind word or deed in her life. I speak for the majority of her family when I say her presence will not be missed by many, very few tears will be shed and there will be no lamenting over her passing. Her family will remember Dolores and amongst ourselves we will remember her in our own way, which were mostly sad and troubling times throughout the years. We may have some fond memories of her and perhaps we will think of those times too. But I truly believe at the end of the day ALL of us will really only miss what we never had, a good and kind mother, grandmother and great-grandmother. I hope she is finally at peace with herself. As for the rest of us left behind, I hope this is the beginning of a time of healing and learning to be a family again. There will be no service, no prayers and no closure for the family she spent a lifetime tearing apart. We cannot come together in the end to see to it that her grandchildren and great-grandchildren can say their goodbyes. So I say here for all of us, GOOD BYE, MOM.

Like this Blog, Except Worthwhile

Something cool:  www.shapevine.com 

It's like this blog, thematically.  Except better.  And it's like this blog, except with cooler graphics, amazing, cutting-edge interactive technology, and the hosts make positive contributions to society. 

It's different in those ways. 

But it's about the church, where it is, and what it can be, if you're interested in that sort of thing.

Check out well-known thinker/writer Andrew Jones who'll be hosting the first live show this week.