So my flag football team made a good play in the last game! We picked up about fifteen yards! Something worked! We exclaimed from the sideline! Our play was a success! High-five with my assistant coach! Yesssss!
Wait -- a flag on the field.
Penalty on us. Illegal Shorts. Loss of down.
Of course. Illegal Shorts. I'd told everyone at the beginning of the year, no pockets. You can't have pocket-shorts in flag football. But our receiver on the play had pocket-shorts.
Wait. It's not just him. It's our other receiver, too. And our quarterback. And our cornerbacks. Half the team had Illegal Shorts. They'd all bought new black shorts to match our black uniforms. We looked sharp, marching back to our own goal-line.
So I called timeout and -- I'm sure Lombardi did this, too -- went through the crowd, asking individuals for their shorts. "Can I have your shorts?" "Hey, can I see your shorts? -- can I have those?" "Can you swap shorts with my backfield?"
We found some shorts, turned others inside out, and cobbled together a team, just in time to be beaten 20 to nothing.
I'm now 1 -17 lifetime as a coach. Pray for us.