There's a fun, sporty site called "Prayers for Blowouts", and they interview people from time to time.
I'm a person, so I qualified. And here's the link. It's a fun site.
I think -- I'm not sure -- but I think I said enough to offend Cubs fans, some pastors, college sports enthusiasts, my P.E. teacher, and maybe Gary Coleman.
And, before you ask, yes -- I was quite serious about the college scholarships thing.