We "Quit Going to Church" a Year Ago

It's been a year since I posted "We Quit Going to Church".  People fairly ask, "Well, what's the alternative?  You can't follow Christ without the church."  And, of course, I've never considered doing that.

It's just that "going to church" is incoherent, I said.  You can read about it here.

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"T" made a great point in his comment on the Barna book, noting that some might think I want to destroy the sweater (of church) by holding this thread while you walk away.  He didn't put it just like that.  But people wonder, understandly, "Okay -- but now what?"

I can't answer that for you.  But T's suggestion of merely asking, "What does God want His people to be doing?" is a great one.  We start there.  Not, in my opinion, with the power of tradition, whether personal or writ large. 

This said, I write the below hoping that you don't see it as prescriptive.  The first thing people want is a how-to, and I can't give it to you.  But we gave up on "going to church", and found the church to be more exciting, more difficult, and -- ironically -- far more attractive than anything we'd experienced before.  Many have asked, "So just what is it you do now?"  I try to answer, in brief, below.

By the way:  Friends, if you "go to church", one of those event-hosting, didactic sermon-centric, or attractional models, God bless you.  Even as I loooooooong for a body of Christ that is free of the trappings I critique, I'm fully aware that there are many in "typical" churches who dwarf my maturity.

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We started getting together with a couple other families, at least twice a week.  They'd been meeting for some time, in different forms.  We ate dinner together on, say, Wednesday, and we had a time devoted to praying and singing and listening and discussing on Sunday afternoon, followed by some more eating.

Another friend joined here, another family-just-met there, and now there's fifty-plus.  Our Sunday thing grew so large, it made it daunting for everyone to be involved.  We've birthed a couple other gathering opportunities in other homes, including ours.  We also still get together for a big meal/party late Sunday afternoon.

And we stay in touch via a Yahoo group, plus many informal get-togethers and help-each-others.

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There is no master plan, and no Giant Vision.  We do not have 501c3 status, though there's nothing wrong with that, and we don't take up a collection, except when there's a need, and there have been several.

We shy away from, "Here's a big project of program I'd like us all to do together..." and instead concentrate on, "How can help each person use his or her gifts in Christ, in their own contexts?"

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There are several leaders, to varying degrees.  If any of them go on an ego trip, they will be rebuked...after everyone stops laughing.  One of our leaders, Mike, says leaders shouldn't be viewed glamorously, as the "eyes" or the "head" of the church.  Instead, the spleen or small intestine come to mind:  Absolutely not glamorous.  Often unseen.  And completely, without question, unarguably, necessary.

Our gatherings are heavy on laughing.  And -- get this -- teaching.  No one "planned" this, but our back-porch conversations are invariably challenging and provocative.  When you hang out and do things with Kingdom people, you will learn.  You can't avoid it.

It's another odd thing this past year:  I've sat through no sermons.  I've learned more about Jesus, and more about the Bible, oddly enough, than ever before.  I'm thinking in new ways;  ways that have me seeing the forest, rather than mere trees.  I know many in our group would second that.

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Money is a challenge.  Not because we have to "tithe", but because we don't.  Because our group's overhead is $0.00, our money now becomes a relational issue -- wtih God.  I have to ask, "Lord, what do you want with us?  Send people across our path who need what we have..."   

We are now able to sponsor more kids through Compassion -- something that's come across our path in a personal way -- and we can walk around with Target or Publix gift cards, for whomever crosses our path in need.  Giving is alive.

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People are a challenge.  With no paid staff, we all see ourselves as pastors, to varying extents.  And this can be draining.  The drag about getting to know people, and knowing they can't turn to some professional in your midst, is that the onus is on us (ooh:  "onus" is "on" "us" -- that's so true) to follow-up. 

The gatherings are not smooth.  People say things out of turn, not everyone naturally socially connects, and there are rough transitions.  It's challenging, as someone who knows how to plan an emotional, get-you-right-there "worship service", to just let...things...be.  This doesn't mean to refuse to correct error -- I'm not talking about that.  It's about allowing silence, letting kids ask questions that have nothing to do with what we were just talking about, knowing when to be done, and knowing when to stop everything and say, "Please pray for me." 

Like I say, not smooth.

We get together for campouts and poker games and cookouts and airgun fights and fishing and white elephant exchanges and moving parties and sometimes some of us have to live with each other, under one roof.  The neighbors think we're a little loud, and we are, but we're trying to be nice.

It's a big mess.  A year ago, a smaller mess.  Like I say, no plan, no Visionary.

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I've been wondering, for my personal life:  Is it possible to just go one day at a time, as cliche as it sounds, and try to be faithful with what God puts in front of you, that day? Would He, in turn, be faithful to hold the future?  Or should I get anxious, take matters into my own hands, and worry about five, ten years hence?

I think I know the answer, hard as it is to live.  The past several months, I've wondered the same thing about us, as a people, here in Jupiter.  Can we just try to be faithful with who the Lord brings before us, including our neighbors, each day, and see what happens?  Or do we need a master plan?

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Not everyone's going to be comfy with this.  I'm not even comfy with it.  It's hard.  And fun.  But hard.

If you have any questions, let me know in the comments, and I'll try to answer what I can.